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what is sick, sad library?

A repository, a sandbox, an art project, a coping mechanism, a virtual happy place, a commonplace book, a little bit of freedom in an increasingly limited Internet: Sick Sad Library is all of these things and more to me. It's where I stick everything I make as well as all that interests, delights, or inspires me. The Library is, first and foremost, for me, though I hope all who visit enjoy it as well ✮⋆˙

"why sick & sad?"

The name "Sick, Sad Library" comes from a fictional reality TV show called Sick, Sad World which exists within the universe of the show Daria. We get snippets of Sick, Sad World throughout the series, always with outlandish and absurd soundbites - "H2-ugh! Are microbes having sex in your drinking water?!" Besides simply relating to Daria as a character, the indulgent ridiculousness of Sick, Sad World speaks to me - as Werner Herzog once said about trash reality TV, "the poet must not avert his eyes." I'm by no means a romantic - in fact, I see ugliness everywhere and draw inspiration from it, just as Daria and Jane do when they're writing and painting while SSW serves as their background noise.

Furthermore, you could say I, myself, am both "sick" and "sad." I'm neurodivergent and have struggled with mental illness for most of my life (if you couldn't tell), which colors my experience of everyday life. For me, some of the most mundane tasks can sometimes feel insurmountable. (Sometimes, they really are insurmountable). For as long as I can remember, I've self-soothed by compiling and organizing and re-organizing various lists. Lists of books I've read, books I want to read, movies, music, plants, animals, recipes, words, anything I could think of. Before ever working in a library, I'd become the dedicated librarian of my own interior world, purely as a means of comfort and survival. Now, I'm turning that library into a pocket of cyberspace. Hence: "Sick, Sad Library."

sick, sad manifesto

  1. The SSL shall be free of commercialism. No ads, sponsorships, nor affiliate links shall be found here.
  2. The SSL is dedicated to an ethos of freedom of information & freedom of speech. I will not engage in self-censorship nor the gatekeeping of information. My own art, even if there are physical copies available for purchase, will always be free to peruse on SSL. I will always do my best to find and list free versions of any resources mentioned, whenever possible.
  3. All art on SSL is created by and for humans, including the code itself. No AI content shall be implemented in the creation or curation of this website. Additionally, whenever possible, creators shall be credited by name and/or link if their work is used on SSL.
  4. Like a printing press or a camera, the Internet is a tool for purposes of creation and/or documentation. SSL is meant to serve its creator and viewers, not the other way around. SSL and the art I keep in it shall be formed in accordance with my own taste and vision, rather than marketability.

fonts used

Canterbury

Garamond

Iowan Old Style

ITC Avant Garde

November

Olivetti Typewriter

Salisbury Bold

So Normal

changelog

  • 3/7/2026: decided to scrap my Japanese literature & women in translation pages and made a single translated fiction page instead, where you can sort by language or filter to books written by women.
  • 3/5/2026: added a zine: "a pedestrian's manifesto".
  • 3/3/2026: added a brand new page called the Billboard. Think of it as "news you can do something about." There's always so much bullshit going on and I want to focus on what we can do about it, so I thought I'd have a page devoted to keeping a time-sensitive collection of efforts like protests, petitions, letter-writing campaigns, mutual aid projects, etc. that people can participate in. It will probably be mostly US-centric since that's where I live and the organizations I hear from/participate in are usually based here. IDK. I know the kinds of things that are safe to post about online can only do so much, but it's better than nothing, at least.
  • 2/27/2026: lots of end-of-the-month updates. Added some new NeoCities neighbors and fun links to the link garden, added some neat graphics websites on credits & resources, added some new art pieces to visions of hell & sin, and some new poems to my page of favorite poetry. Also started using a cute little "new" graphic to signal new additions on some of these pages. Enjoy!
  • 2/26/2026: updated my horror reading recommendation page. It'll look a bit different now, but has some fun filtering capabilities through JS now :)
  • 2/25/2026: favorite poems page is live!
  • 2/18/2026: Added to my zine collection page and did some minor reformatting. The collection is now ordered alphabetically by title.
  • 2/9/2026: New zine alert! Check out this zine I made for my book arts class: Eye Spy
  • 1/10/2026: made small tweaks to my landing page & added a page about how I turned my old smart phone into a Digital Audio Player.
  • 1/8/2026: started some intensive maintenance today. Cleaned up code and resized images on the homepage and fixed broken links throughout the entire site.
  • 1/4/2026: posted a new poem, "where i live".
  • 1/3/2026: 2026 media log is now live.
  • 12/10/2025: been working on this a while - added a Linux Resources page!
  • 11/18/2025: the Queer literature recommendation page is now live!
  • 9/11/2025: majorly overhauled the reading room page. all the same links are there, it just looks different now.
  • 8/31/2025: August journal entry/media log is now live! Also just did some updates in the link garden and in some of my reading lists.
  • 8/20/2025: removed web-building credits from this page since I have a more detailed list in the link garden and didn't think the redundancy was necessary. Over the past week, also created a page meant to be soothing and a zine collection page.
  • 8/9/2025: added my log of my 2022 reading and scans of one of my old zines
  • 7/22/2025: you may now view visions of hell & sin lol
  • 7/20/2025: The first curio cabinet page is live - other people's photos
  • 7/17/2025: Joined the Little Pixel Library and added a small section for it at the bottom of the reading room page. Added some stuff to the link garden. Added new journal entry.
  • 7/15/2025: Made a little picture book shrine.
  • 7/11/2025: It took me 2 days to figure the JavaScript out, but now I've got a button over in the Link Garden that will take you to a random website.
  • 7/6/2025: added a page for my ongoing Beowulf translation project. Also added my essay about The Company of Wolves.
  • 7/5/2025: added 2020 reading page. Added some new resources to link garden.
  • 7/3/2025: added subject guide for reading and writing and another one of my old sketchbooks.
  • 7/2/2025: finally changed the homepage to something I actually like. Also added a favicon and a custom cursor for all pages.
  • 6/29/2025: now have a journal page with my June 2025 entry already up
  • 6/26/2025: now I've got a link garden! I also finally made a button for the site which lives there :)
  • 6/24/2025: finally made an about me page!
  • 6/22/2025: created page to keep track of this year's reading, posted my review of Freshwater by Akwaeke Emezi, and also made an index to keep track of reviews as I inevitably write & post more.
  • 6/21/2025: created page for sketchbooks and added my 2018-2019 sketchbook.
  • 6/20/2025: created studio page.
  • 6/19/2025: completed (most) of my library pages :)
  • 6/14/2025: added a sitemap! Also created Christianity subject guide
  • 6/13/2025: added a short story: "The Trail"
  • 6/12/2025: created a page dedicated to my current writing project.
  • 6/10/2025: created zine page and added undream zine.
  • 6/9/2025: added poem "The Little Room."
  • 6/8/2025: created the writing desk page. Most of the buttons here don't lead anywhere yet, but I did manage to put up an essay about divine machinery. Also created a page for Japanese literature recommendations.